


Virgin Sacrifice

by hillay17



Category: Original Work
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2020-12-18
Updated: 2020-12-18
Packaged: 2021-03-11 04:14:20
Rating: Mature
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 3,435
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/28158879
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/hillay17/pseuds/hillay17
Summary: What's a girl supposed to do when her former classmates are trying to sacrifice her to a cult as a virgin sacrifice? Go try to get laid, duh.





	Virgin Sacrifice

I really don’t know how they clocked me, to be honest. I’m very flirty. I wear leather jackets, I drive a motorcycle, I wear red lipstick. But yet, this stupid cult still decided that I was just the girl they needed for their virgin sacrifice. I got a stupid letter written in what I’m almost certain was blood this morning. It just said WE ARE COMING, but like there’s only one cult in this town so who else was it gonna be.

So yeah. This virgin is about to become anything but. Try to sacrifice me then, Dennis. Fucking asshole.

The truth is, I never felt like having sex with anyone. Half my friends got the whole virginity thing over with in high school and the other half in college, and here I am, out of college and I just couldn’t ever be bothered. I’ve had opportunities for it plenty of times, but I never went through with it because I just- didn’t feel like it. I don’t know. Regardless, there were plenty of places I could go to get this shit over with.

I text my friend who parties like every weekend and ask her if she’s going out. She is. Duh. I sigh and put on my smallest dress and- I guess I should do my makeup too. It’s looking pretty stale because when I got up this morning I wasn’t expecting to need to have sex on short notice to prevent a cult from sacrificing me to their eldritch god/demon in order to bring about the end of the world. It’s just not something you think about when you get dressed, you know?

I’m wearing pink, which is weird, for me, but I figure it’s going to send a signal, if you know what I mean. So I do my makeup pink and girly too. I look entirely unlike myself in this getup. But it’s fine.

Michelle pulls up right on schedule, and almost squeals about my appearance. “Just drive,” I say, trying to hide the apathy in my voice. From the way her face falls, it’s clear that I have failed.

“It’s just that I never see you all dolled up like this! Is there an occasion?”

“Yeah, actually”, I say. “You remember Dennis P from high school?”

“Yes….” she replies, confused.

“I got this from him today.” I hand her the letter, which I’ve folded into my glittery, tiny purse.

“Holy shit!” She turns it over. “That’s all it says? We are coming? How do you know this is him, anyway?”

“I was in a group project with him for months. That’s his handwriting. Besides, who else do we even know that belongs to a death cult? I mean, besides maybe Tyler.”

“Fair enough,” sighs Michelle. “But what does this have to do with you coming out with us tonight?”

“Us?”

“Yeah, I’m bringing Em and Morgan. But please answer the question, I’m getting seriously worried.”

“Well, you know how they always sacrifice virgins,” I say, hoping I don’t have to complete the embarrassing sentence.

“Yeah?”

Oh my God, Michelle, do the fucking math. Then again, she did fail Algebra one, two, geometry, trigonometry, and even remedial math and then went on to be an English major, so maybe expecting her to do the math was on me.

“I’m a virgin, Michelle.”

“Wait, what?” Oh God, here we go. “But- but what about Brandon?”

“Girl, we dated for a month in Junior year. No, we literally kissed like twice.”

“Seriously? Well um….what about Georgie?”

“Ha. She turned out to be straight, so no. You knew this, Michelle.”

“Okay, but I’m straight and I’ve made out with girls.”

“Yeah, made out. While drunk. That’s what Georgie and I did too, until eventually she was like ‘I’ve made a mistake’ and dipped.”

We are at Em’s house. I always forget that she lives in a straight-up mansion. She comes out in a tiny black dress that, if you squint, is basically lingerie. 

“Heyyyyyyyyyyyyyy girlies!” Oh, Jesus, she already has alcohol on her breath. I can smell it as she opens the door. 

“What’s up, my love?” Michelle tossed her the thing of altoids in the front seat. “Take one of these, please, I don’t want you stinking up my lovely 2005 Honda Civic.” The irony in her voice is palpable.

“You should just get a new car!” Em exclaims, and Michelle and I roll our eyes at each other.

We drive on. Em is taking up all of Michelle’s time, so I am left staring out the window, trying not to think about my imminent peril if I’m unsuccessful tonight. At least I’m bisexual and therefore theoretically have more options.

We finally arrive at Morgan’s apartment. She won’t come out even after we all text her, so we park and go in. 

She is watching South Park with her exclusively male roommates. I have never quite been able to figure out why her social group consists exclusively of the type of dudes who would watch South Park and drink shitty craft beer at all hours of the day, but whatever. Then Michelle decides that she wants to flirt with one of these science bros and we get held up for like 20 minutes, and I actually start watching the South Park episode because I don’t want to be in this situation that badly. We need to get to the bar ASAP. The sacrifice ritual is literally tomorrow afternoon. The longer we wait, the worse my chances of getting laid are going to be. I start wondering what the exact parameters of virginity were for these guys. Like, does it count if I have sex with a girl? Do I have to literally have penetrative sex or were other kinds okay? How would they even know? Would they just kidnap me anyway and then once they tried to do the ritual it would fail? How does Dennis even know I’m a virgin in the first place?

My train of thought is interrupted as this fucking guy finally agrees to come with us to the bar, and we’re off. I forget to call shotgun so this stupid roommate dude ends up in the front seat. He introduces himself as Sam and I don’t even attempt to care. I’m squeezed between Em and Morgan in the backseat, so I grimace at Sam and flatly tell him my name. Suddenly Michelle becomes an awful driver, and starts jerking forward painfully. We all yell at her. Em is sort of thrown into my lap, and suddenly her hair is all up in my face and I look away as quickly as I can, because she is still kinda drunk and I’m completely sober, and already cursing myself for the outfit choice because it’s riding up and I can’t even fix it because this car was not meant for three grown adults to sandwich themselves into its backseat like this. Kids, maybe, but even then I feel like it would be a bit dicey. If I sit perfectly still and don’t breathe it isn’t too bad, but Michelle continues driving like a madwoman. Is she trying to impress the guy by fitting into the perceived gender role of woman=bad at driving? Who’s to say.

“How are you, Morgan?” I ask. “It’s been a while.”

“Oh, you know,” says Morgan. “I’m fine. A lot of homework.” Morgan is the only one of us going to grad school. I respect her for it, but the concept of going to grad school myself is frankly terrifying.

“Do you have any idea what-“ I’m suddenly interrupted by a huge pothole that throws us all into the air. Em screams and clutches me for support.

“Is she okay?” Morgan raised an eyebrow.

“I just want to get onto her level,” I said, which is enough to make Morgan laugh.

While we have been having this conversation, Sam has not ceased in describing all the minutiae of his field research to Michelle, who’s been unable to get a word in edgewise. She still seems into it for some reason, though.

We finally arrive at the bar, and I let out a deep breath that, contrary to what you might think, I have been keenly aware I have been holding.

I look around for signs of any cultists coming to kidnap me, but it seems like we’re in the clear. At least for now.

The fucking bouncer doesn’t believe that I’m under 21 because he stares at my ID for a good ten seconds, but eventually he does in fact let me in. I give him my fakest smile and go in after my friends. I guess I should take it as a compliment, but being immature is what got me into this whole mess in the first place, so I can’t feel too happy about it.

The bar is just a bar. Nothing magical about it. Not that I expected anything different, it’s just- well, I remember back when I was too young to come here I always looked in with such a sense of wonder and excitement, but now it’s like yeah, whatever, it’s just the stupid local bar. They don’t even have good cocktails. If we really wanted good drinks we’d be better off at the sushi restaurant, but that’s a restaurant not a bar, so here we fucking are anyways.

There’s a bunch of people I recognize from high school, so it’s a hard no thanks from me on that front. I’m so sick of my hometown.

I try flirting with a random guy, but he’s honestly so self-obsessed so I make an excuse and leave him with his friends. A girl chats me up but I’m pretty sure she’s straight. She’s giving off exactly zero vibes. Em almost leaves with a frat bro but he’s not drunk and she is so we get her out of that situation. Sam and Michelle really seem to have hit it off. This annoys me because Michelle has awful taste in men and I hate putting up with her boyfriends.

Do I even like any of these people? I love them, because we’ve been friends since we were kids, and they’re certainly fun to party with, but still. I can’t figure it out.

I’m about four shots deep when I spot him and my heart stops.

Dennis. He’s sitting at the bar, and like a bad movie, time slows to a grinding halt as he swivels his head in my direction and locks eyes with me. He stands up immediately and strides over with purpose.

“Dennis,” I say, trying to sound both casual and intimidating.

“I didn’t expect to see you here,” he says, and he means it. Why am I so stupid?

“Well, too bad, Dennis, because-“ I grab Sam, who is the closest person to me, “I’m taking him home with me tonight and we are going to fuck and then I won’t be available to your little cult. So why don’t you get out of here, Dennis?”

He stares at me. Stares at Sam. Stares at my friends, who are starting to surround me and ball their fists. Before he has time to work out what to do I punch him in the face.

Almost immediately a bouncer approaches us. “She started it!” Dennis whimpers, and the man looks me up and down and grabs my arm. Not roughly, but firmly. I’m not actually that strong, so I don’t fight this. Sam follows me.

“Did you mean it?” Sam actually sounds upset, to his credit. “Because Michelle and I-“

“No.” I underestimated him. And now I feel guilty. I smile slightly. “It’s a long story. Sorry to rope you into it.”

“Let’s go,” says the bouncer, and shoves me almost gently out the door.

Dennis joins me.

“Not so brave without your friends, are you?” Dennis snivels.

“You know, I really expected you to make something of yourself, Dennis,” I say “calmly”. “You were a smart kid back in the day. The teachers loved you. What happened?”

“Stop trying to distract me. If Blathanord is to rise tomorrow afternoon we need a virgin sacrifice!”

I sigh. “I’m not a virgin.”

“I can smell it on you. You are.” Ah, well. Worth a shot.

Just then my friends appear at my side again. I guess Sam told them what happened.

“You gonna try to mess with her?” Michelle stands up straight, and her tall 6’2” self dwarfs Dennis in comparison. “You’ll have to go through all of us.”

“Yeah!” Em screams. “Go find another virgin to sacrifice, fucker!”

He stalks away.

“You shouldn’t have said that,” I sigh. “He’s actually going to go do that.”

“Well, then,” Morgan says quietly, “I guess we have to stop this cult once and for all.”

“Wait, seriously?” Sam is getting paler by the second. “God, this town is even weirder than I thought.”

“You’ll get used to it,” says Michelle. She kisses him.

Good for her, I suppose. We all start to follow Dennis in the dark, as he isn’t exactly being sneaky. He seems like he’s on something, but then again, these cultists always do.

Like the complete idiot Dennis clearly is, he leads us right to his cult meeting. It’s at the abandoned quarry off Elm Street. Figures. Like if I were to guess where a death cult would have its meetings, that would probably be my second guess after someone’s mom’s basement.

They are gathered around some kind of pentagram-looking shape on the ground. It’s not actually a pentagram- they aren’t Satanists, after all- but it’s got a similar appearance. They are all wearing red robes and crowns made of sticks and fall leaves. It would be kind of a sick halloween costume under different circumstances.

But. These are these circumstances.

“What do we do?” Michelle asks.

“Shouldn’t we call the cops?” Sam asks, sounding terrified. I laugh softly. 

“You really aren’t from around here, are you, Sam?”

“No,” he whispers. “But this seems like the sort of thing-“

“It’s not. Just trust me,” I say, looking him straight in the eyes. They are so full of terror. Poor boy’s never seen anything like this in his life. I envy him for that.

“I say we bum rush them,” Em says, pulling pepper spray out of her bag. I gently push her hand down.

“Em, no. They’re too strong and there’s too many of them.” I think hard. “We need to take them out one by one.” Just as I finish my thought, they all start chanting loudly, and a figure who I can only assume is Dennis enters the circle.

“Have you found the virgin sacrifice?” They say it all together in a discordant chorus.

“She has followed me here, fool that she is!” Dennis laughs and I think it’s supposed to be an evil laugh, but he clearly needs to work on it because it isn’t intimidating at all. But then he points directly at our little group and one of the cultists approaches us so fast we don’t even have time to react, and grabs me by the arm, and then almost floats back to the circle. Like straight up, he doesn’t run, his feet don’t even seem to be touching the ground. Suddenly I feel actual terror flood my senses for the first time all night. I scream. Dennis is a lot smarter than I was giving him credit for.

The circle is actually nothing like a pentagram. The shape flickers and changes like ripples in a pool, and it’s all I can do not to stare into it.

“Okay, everyone. You know what to do,” Dennis says, and his voice is a lot deeper and scarier now, but still recognizable as him. I think back to when we were in the same history class in sophomore year of high school. He was a nice guy back then. He was very interested in the Enlightenment period. He wrote his final paper on the differences in belief systems in some of the most famous philosophers of the period. He helped me choose my topic, too. I never liked history very much.

The cultists start circling around, or at least, I think they do. It’s hard to tell because I continue to be compelled to stare into the symbol on the ground. They are chanting in a language I’ve never heard before, and I feel completely alone.

Suddenly, there’s a scream. It sounds almost feral, and it gets louder and louder as it approaches. Then I hear the sound of an aerosol spray and I know exactly what it is. My face breaks into a smile.

“We’re saving you from this! Don’t worry!” I have never been happier to hear Em’s voice.

The chanting stops. One guy starts to cry loudly in pain. There is a loud crunch that sounds like someone’s nose being broken. Arms wrap around me and turn me around. 

Michelle. She’s searching my eyes for something.

“Michelle? What’s wrong?”

She hugs me tightly and her body started shaking in sobs.

“Michelle, we gotta get out of here.”

“Yes we do,” she says. She lets go of me, stands up, and swings her leg in a circle, which trips the cultist that is approaching us. 

It’s Tyler Johnson. I remember him too. He was a big gamer back in school. I remember I went to his house one time to play GTA. I think he had a crush on me back then, but I was pretty oblivious and didn’t even realize until later. He’s standing up now, his eyes full of an emotion I don’t recognize but that scares me almost as badly as the symbol on the ground. I’m still too dazed to fight him, but Michelle isn’t. She stands up and socks him right in the jaw. He goes flying.

Michelle reaches out to me, and I grab her hand and pull myself up. I don’t have any kind of weapon, and I’ve never been much use in a fight, but I do my best. I punch the guy running at us but it doesn’t connect right and I end up hurting my hand. He screams a battle cry but Sam has managed to find a pretty sizable log and hits the guy with it as hard as he can. The guy falls over, bleeding.

“Sam?” Michelle’s voice is small. “Is he dead?”

“I don’t-” Sam’s voice cracks hard, and he clears his throat. “I really don’t want to think about that right now.”

“We have to get out of here!” It’s Morgan. She’s caught up to us. She sounds terrified. “Where is Em?”

“Don’t look at the symbol,” I warn everyone as we all look around.

There she is, pepper spraying another cultist and screaming her head off. She really is a force to be reckoned with. I never knew.

“Let’s fucking go!” Em finally approaches us. “This should set them back, at least until the next apocalypse!”

We run. I want to scream, or cry, or laugh, or something, but I need to save my breath. We run all the way back into town, clothes torn and drops of blood on Sam and Michelle, but we are all still a bit drunk and don’t think to try and get it off. We enter the sushi restaurant in a daze. I order yaki udon for everyone as payment for saving my life, and the server doesn’t even look at us twice. It’s a Saturday night in this town, so I’m sure he’s seen weirder. Michelle tries to order ten orders of California rolls but we change it to two. Sam and Michelle make out in the booth and I can’t even bring myself to be annoyed by it. Sam seems like a pretty great guy, actually. 

“Are the police going to be after us?” Sam asks suddenly, deep into his second plate of udon noodles.

“No,” Morgan says nonchalantly. “We did them a favor, really. Those cultists are always causing disappearances. Now that their apocalypse is delayed, they won’t cause much trouble for a while.”

“This town is so fucking weird,” says Sam. 

We laugh. I shove a California roll into my mouth. Em has sobered up after all this food, and leans into me as I chew. I turn my head to look at her, brushing her hair out of her face. She grins at me and I grin back, swallowing the California roll. She kisses me so fast that I barely have time to react. I kiss her back. 


End file.
